Give Her What She Needs

Barra do Sargi, Bahia Brazil

So often in industrialized societies, we are preoccupied with what we want, what we need, our timelines, where we need to be next, the hustle, the grind, paying the bills, trying to get food on the table, we are not able to take the time to really listen.

This is a story about the power of listening.

It was our last day in Serra Grande and we wanted to ride. Our friends Alexandre and Victor found some horses down the road, and we were out the door.

There were 4 horses. We were all experienced riders. It was Ani, Franny, Di and me….and Giancarlo on a bike. We met our guide Magno and his father at their Beachfront Posada as they were finishing tacking up the horses.

Magno’s father was a true horse whisperer. He spoke their language and for 70+ years was in deep relationship with these magnificent beings. Magno was a part time horse guide, part time surf instructor, world traveler, and Bahiano.

“We will not be running the horses on the beach. It is not good for them.” Magno’s demeanor was serious, full of care and caution. This set the tone.

After we each chose our horse companion, or rather they chose us, we mounted and began to walk across a sandy courtyard towards the beach. Magno followed on his black and white paint Stallion.

“We will stay here. Take 5 minutes to get to know your horses.” This dropped us deeper into knowing that this experience was more than a simple ride on the beach. This was about creating a relationship with these magnificent beings. Asking for permission, giving gratitude. Showing respect and love for the journey they were about to take us on.

Little did we know, our hearts were about to burst open in the most profound way.

After we all had a moment to connect with our equine companions, we began our slow, sweet, saunter down the sand. Waves crashing, wind in our hair, sun on our skin. Medicine, all around. What a gift, what a blessing. What a privilege.

We came to a place where the river met the ocean, Barra do Sargi. Here, the horses enthusiastically entered the water. They began to splash and play….and next thing you know, Ani’s horse buckles her knees and begins to roll in the water! Ani quickly dismounted, uninjured, and the horse fully saddled and bridled was happily submerged in the cool, refreshing waters. We all chuckled nervously wondering who’s horse was going down next.

As Magno approached calmly, he said…”I’m going to give her what she needs.” Without reprimand, without disappointment that the leather saddle was sopping wet, or concern for time, he led the horse from the water. He quietly removed the soaking wet saddle and blanket and placed it on the dry ground. He walked the horse back into the water, and gently began to bathe her, tenderly splashing water on her neck and back.

We all took a sharp, collective inhale as we witnessed this powerful moment of true, deep listening.

Each of us proceeded to remove our horses saddle’s and blanket’s, reenter the water and have a swim party with our horse companions.

A 30 minute “ride” turned into 2 hours…and the experience of a lifetime. A deep life lesson.

This example of TRUE listening. And having the luxury of taking the time to respond.

This can be applied in so many aspects of our lives. With our children, our parents, our partners, our family and friends, our animal companions. There are often actions and behaviors that are simply a call for an unmet need. All too often, we shut down this call- dismiss it, reprimand it. Our busy lives do not provide us with the space, time or energy to truly listen.

I acknowledge this experience was a true privilege. This, I do not take lightly. I realize that many of us may never have an opportunity to take a horseback ride on a beach, nonetheless, travel on an airplane, splash in the ocean, or get time off from our 40+ hour workweek. There is a system in place to keep us grinding, blinders on, goal-oriented, time-driven, disconnected and depleted.

Instead of looking down at what is right in front of us, the goal, the product, the struggle….

Look Up.

Look around.

At the journey.

The process.

Ask… Why?

What I hope to inspire is that each of us find a way to quiet our busy lives, take a moment out of the hustle and grind to tap in and listen to our inner wisdom. Listen to each other. Listen to Nature. Find a way to connect.

Listen to the call.

How will you respond?